Overlooked no longer
"Death is a distant rumor to the young." --Andy Rooney
NEWS & NOTES
What is the best day to hold a funeral?
In a busy world, scheduling memorial services is not easy. Death is often unexpected or inconveniently timed. Some religions and cultures also believe in a quick burial or cremation or require mourners to avoid holding ceremonies on certain days.
Generally, a funeral is held one to three weeks after a death. Although afternoon weekday funerals are the most common in the U.K., people in the states tend to opt for late morning or midday services.
The first step in selecting a date is to discuss the matter with the deceased's inner circle. If many folks must travel to participate, consider holding the funeral on a Monday, Friday or during the weekend. This will give friends and family the time they need to make work, child care and travel arrangements.
Are most of the bereaved local and elderly? Then a weekday funeral may be more convenient.
You'll also want to avoid scheduling the funeral on a holiday, birthday or anniversary. Consider weather as well, specifically times when storms could impede travel.
Should you feel overwhelmed by the whole process -- or simply want to avoid unnecessary battles with others who are grieving -- talk to the funeral home. The funeral director is experienced in such matters and can help you find a date that causes the least amount of drama. Just know in advance that weekend funerals may require an additional cost.
FMI: Click here.
Honoring people overlooked by history
A feeling of closure
Five men were recently honored with a plaque that was placed in the depths of Lake Champlain.
Pilot George Nikita, copilot Richard Kirby Windsor and businessmen Frank Wilder, Donald Myers and Robert Ransom Williams III died on January 27, 1971, when their corporate jet vanished shortly after taking off from the Burlington International Airport during a snowstorm.
Their bodies were never recovered.
Although numerous searches were attempted, the location of the crash site remained a mystery for 50 years. That is, until earlier this year when a search and recovery team from New Hampshire discovered it at the bottom of the lake.
On Oct. 13, Gary Lefebvre of Colchester, Vt., used a remote-operated vehicle to lower the memorial marker into the water and place it near the jet’s debris field. The underwater memorial bears the names of the dead as well as the message: "Too well loved to ever be forgotten. Rest in peace."
"Just being able to lower that plaque on the site really gave me a feeling of closure," Frank Wilder, whose father died in the crash, told NBC5News. "Now that I know he's there and the plane's there and I know where it is, I feel more at peace."
FMI: Click here.
SUPPORT THE END FILES
The End Files is a reader-supported newsletter featuring news about death, grief, funerals and obituaries. Subscriptions are only $5/month, or $50/year. Everyone who purchases a subscription will be automatically entered into a monthly giveaway for books, gift certificates and other prizes.
WEEKLY POLL
LAST WEEK’S POLL
NOTABLE OBITS
* Renowned atheist Kenneth Bronstein has died. He was 85. In 2000, the retired IBM engineer and Army veteran helped to revive the NYC Atheists and served as its president. His goal was to support the separation of church and state and to eliminate any special privileges that society accorded to religion. Bronstein and the NYC Atheists fought against the inclusion of a 17-foot-tall steel beam in the shape of a cross in the 9/11 Memorial as well as the use of the motto “In God we trust” on money and the addition of the phrase “under God” to the Pledge of Allegiance. (Sam Roberts, The New York Times)
* Elwood Edwards, 74, a broadcast TV veteran who made his mark in pop culture with a few simple phrases, died. After spending years doing commercials and station announcements, Edwards received $200 in 1989 for recording these four statements: "Welcome." "You've got mail." "File's done." "Goodbye." The up-and-coming online service provider America Online used those recordings and by the mid-1990s, Edwards’ voice was heard more than 35 million times a day. His contribution to America's introduction to cyberspace also inspired the 1998 film "You've Got Mail," starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. (Harrison Smith, The Washington Post)
* Actress Teri Garr, who earned an Oscar nomination for the film "Tootsie," died at 79. In the 1970s and 1980s, she starred in numerous hit movies, including "The Conversation," "Close Encounters of the Third Kind," "Young Frankenstein" and "Mr. Mom." In the 1990s, Garr made an impression on generations of "Friends" fans by playing the birth mother of Lisa Kudrow’s character, Phoebe. In 2002, Garr became a spokeswoman for multiple sclerosis after publicly revealing her diagnosis. (Valerie J. Nelson, Los Angeles Times)
* Dancer Judith Jamison, 81, who became an international star with the Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater, has died. At 5-foot-10, Jamison was "the antithesis of the small-boned, demure dancer with a classically feminine shape.” She left Ailey in 1980 to star in the Broadway musical "Sophisticated Ladies," but eventually returned and became the troupe's director. Under her guidance, the company grew in size, budget and stature and became one of the most successful modern dance companies in the U.S. (Brian Seibert, The New York Times)
* Quincy Jones, the legendary record producer, arranger and film composer who made the bestselling album of all time (Michael Jackson's "Thriller"), has died at 91. Over his many decades in music, Jones worked with everyone from Ray Charles to Frank Sinatra to Ice-T. He produced, arranged and conducted a supergroup of more than 40 singers performing the song “We Are the World,” which raised millions for famine relief. Jones was nominated for 80 Grammy Awards and won 28, and was the recipient of both a National Medal of Arts and a National Endowment for the Arts Jazz Master fellowship. (Ben Ratliff, The New York Times)
* Home Depot co-founder Bernie Marcus, 95, died. A natural salesman, Marcus helped to build the home improvement retailer into a worldwide giant with more than 2,300 stores. The billionaire donated millions to Republican causes and candidates and supported Donald Trump's presidential campaigns in 2016, 2020 and 2024. Marcus was also a philanthropist, who financed the Georgia Aquarium and poured millions into the research and treatment of stroke, post-traumatic stress, traumatic brain injuries and substance abuse. (Jim Tharpe and Matt Kempner, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution)
* Murray McCory, who founded the outdoor equipment company JanSport, died. He was 80. McCory was still in college when he designed a hiking backpack with an adjustable aluminum frame, a nylon pack and a pocket for a water bottle that earned him first place in a national competition. Using seed money from his father and his girlfriend, McCory launched JanSport and took his version of a lightweight backpack to market, revolutionizing school life for millions of students. (Clay Risen, The New York Times)
* Actor Alan Rachins, 82, who starred in the long-running TV shows "L.A. Law" and "Dharma & Greg," died. He made his Broadway debut in 1967's "After the Rain" and was one of the original fully-nude performers of the off-Broadway hit "Oh! Calcutta." Rachins earned both Emmy and Golden Globe nominations for his small-screen performances and was married to actress Joanna Frank, who also played his wife on "L.A. Law." (Malie Mendez, Los Angeles Times)
* Phil Rickman, a British author who was best known for his Merrily Watkins mystery series, died at 74. Rickman wrote more than a dozen books about a down-to-earth female priest and exorcist; the series was later adapted into the ITV drama "Midwinter of the Spirit." Rickman was also a journalist and spent 20 years as the host of the literature program "Phil the Shelf" on BBC Radio Wales. His final novel, "The Echo of Crows," is due to be published next year. (Lena-Zaharah Mohammed and Gavin Thomas, BBC News)
* Tony Todd, 69, the actor known for starring as the eponymous hook-wielding ghost in the "Candyman" slasher franchise, has died. Todd had more than 200 credits to his name, and appeared in films such as "Platoon," "The Crow," "The Rock" and "Final Destination." He also had a recurring role on the TV show “Boston Public” and played Kurn, a commander in the Klingon Defense Force and the brother of Worf, in "Star Trek: The Next Generation." (J. Kim Murphy, Variety)
FAMOUS DEATHS IN HISTORY
On November 11, abolitionist/women's rights activist Lucretia Mott (87), the last sovereign monarch of the Hawaiian Kingdom Liliʻuokalani (79) and South African President/Nobel Prize laureate F.W. de Klerk (85)
On November 12, actor William Holden (63), author/screenwriter Ira Levin (78) and model/actress/audiobook publisher Deborah Raffin (59)
On November 13, Italian composer Gioachino Rossini (76), Danish Antillean and French painter Camille Pissarro (73) and the first woman to direct a feature film Lois Weber (60)
On November 14, German philosopher Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel (61), author/educator Booker T. Washington (59) and the first woman mayor of Chicago Jane Byrne (81)
On November 15, German astronomer/mathematician Johannes Kepler (58), actor/director Lionel Barrymore (76) and German paleontologist Emma Richter (68)
On November 16, actor Clark Gable (59), screenwriter William Goldman (87) and author A.S. Byatt (87)
On November 17, English pirate captain Calico Jack (37), French sculptor Auguste Rodin (77) and gossip columnist Sheilah Graham (84)
On November 18, novelist Paul Bowles (88), soul singer Sharon Jones (60) and Pulitzer Prize-winning composer Ned Rorem (99)
RECOMMENDED SUBSTACK
FAMOUS LAST WORDS
"I thank you, sir, for your generous sympathy, but I die the death I always prayed for, the death of a soldier fighting for the rights of man." --Baron Johann de Kalb, an officer in the American War of Independence, speaking to a British officer after being mortally wounded at the Battle of Camden
MOMENT OF GRATITUDE
Thanks to The Good Funeral Guide, Unsplash, Batchelor Brothers Inc., Krause Funeral Home, Bartlett-Heritage Funeral Home & Cremation Center, Your Funeral Choice, Beyond the Dash, TED, YouTube, NBC5 News, Apple News, NYC Atheists, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, CBS Sunday Morning, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, BBC News, Stacy Langenkamp, Variety, Mathew MacQuarrie, On This Day, Playback.FM, Britannica: This Day in History, Time and Date, Wikipedia, A Bit of Good News, DeathReady with T.J. and Deposit Photos for art and story suggestions.
KEEP IN TOUCH
Heard some interesting death-related news? Read a great obituary? Or do you know of someone we should interview? Reach out:
Like this newsletter? Please forward it to your friends and encourage them to subscribe.
Thanks for the recommend! I love reading your posts, especially honoring those who have died recently but also in the near and far past. So many interesting names to go google...